In the tenth hour of Dragon Age: Origins, I change my mind and head for the Circle of Magi, where I learn everything is even more fucked up than I could imagine. Intrigued? Then it’s time for Mark to play Dragon Age: Origins.
hahaha sdfha; a;kls why
why do i think i am prepared for this game WHY DO I DO THIS TO MYSELF
- I initially traveled to Redcliffe. I wanted to confront Loghain, but I changed my mind when I realized it would be way more awesome if I could collect more companions throughout my journey before I beat him down. Before I could turn around and access the World Map, though, Alastair decided to pull me aside to reveal a secret he apparently could not wait to tell me.
- WHAT THE FUCK, CAILAN WAS HIS HALF BROTHER AND THAT TECHNICALLY MAKES HIM A PRINCE WHAT THE HOLY FUCK IS GOING ON.
- Oh my god, you better believe that I immediately chose to make fun of Alastair and call him “my prince” at the first opportunity. WOULD YOU EXPECT ANYTHING LESS OF ME?
- So! I routed my party up to Lake Calanhad so we could go talk to some wizards and shit. Before we even got there, my party got stopped in a narrow valley by a damsel in distress! And of course I offered to help her. I would seriously die in real life if I were in this world.
- One of my notes says, “WTF, is this a trap?”
- Guess what?
- It was a trap.
- Why the fuck are these elves attacking me? I’m one of you!!!!
- After we beautifully kicked their asses (STEN’S BATTLE AXE IS SO AMAZING OMG IT STUNS WHEN HE BRINGS IT DOWN), I decided that it might be fun to talk to the one elf who survived and would not shut up. And so I meet Zevran, an assassin from the Antivan Crows hired to kill me, who tries to outsass me, but then I totally got him to be my companion. HOLY SHIT, YOU HAVE NO IDEA HOW MUCH I LOVE THAT YOU CAN DO THIS. Like, not only can you just pick up new people during your journey, but then the game asks if you want to change who comes with you when you travel to an important location. It happens far more frequently than I expected, and it’s a pleasure to see it happen.
- I finally made it Lake Calanhad, where I immediately picked up five miscellaneous missions from the Mages Collective. I have so many unfinished missions that it’s ridiculous. I am especially excited about the one where I get to discharge students. I WILL FIRE YOU WITH VIOLENCE. Okay, I probably won’t, considering that they’re apparently “sensitive.” I want whatever secret items they have! I suppose I’ll be nice.
- All right, time to go talk to the mages. Who are you, and why aren’t you letting me cross in your boat? Carroll? Your name is Carroll? What the hell, did you just try to sass me? Are you doing it again? Oh, you do not fuck with Roslin, she will sass you into another dimension.
- Actually, all I had to do was intimidate him. That worked!
- You have no clue how much I laughed when Greagoir was giving that speech about NO ONE SHALL COME ACROSS and THE DOOR SHALL OPEN FOR NO ONE and then here I am, evidence that his totalitarian dictator ways are for naught. I will not follow your extremist modes of travel!
- On Mark Watches, I often speak of my love for heist stories. I don’t know why the entertain me so much, but they do. Guess what other story trope I love? Extraction stories. Yeah, where you have to enter a ~super dangerous and scary~ place and get someone out. So when Greagoir explained that the darkspawn had taken over the tower, possibly corrupting and killing tons of mages, and that I had to find one (Irving) in order to stop the Annulment, I knew that I was all about this fucking game. Fuck the main plot, I don’t even care about the Archdemon anymore. I want to do this right now. THIS IS EXCELLENT.
- I totally saw that Templar shake his head in disapproval once he barred the door behind me. THIS IS A NO JUDGE ZONE, YOU COWARD. I don’t see you fighting any darkspawn, do I? Then shut your face, you bigot.
- I’m basically on a side mission of sorts, and within this side mission, I got two more side missions. First, I found those diary pages about the “Reaching” and something in the basement??? I don’t know what the fuck this is, but I sure as hell am going to find all the missing pages to determine what this dude is talking about.
- WHAT THE FUCK IS WYNNE DOING HERE?
- Oh my god ANOTHER AMAZING MORAL CONNUNDRUM. Wynne and many of the other mages were locked in that fucking tower by Greagoir. Morrigan is NOT HAVING ANY OF THEIR BULLSHIT because she is fiercely anti-Chantry / anti-religion. For a second, I thought she might not even come with me if I agreed to follow Wynne and help her out. Ultimately, she did, but I had to gift her some sweet jewelry, and now she’s super happy. I would have left her behind, despite how powerful she is, because I wanted to support these people. Just because I didn’t believe what they did or support the Chantry doesn’t mean I won’t support their right to believe what they want. Also, leaving them behind to die is FUCKED UP. Yeah, Morrigan, 100% not having it with your idea that people who believe differently than you should be left die terrible deaths.
- I admit that I was nervous as hell while Wynne was opening the magical barrier she created. What sort of things were on the other side.
- PRIEST. ABOMINATIONS. WHO EXPLODE INTO FLAMES WHEN THEY DIE. WHAT THE FUCK.
- DESIRE ABOMINATIONS. RAGE ABOMINATIONS. HUNGER ABOMINATIONS. WHAT THE FUCK ARE THESE THINGS? Oh my god, spirits possessing mages are FRIGHTENING THINGS.
- I totally did the Summoning Sciences. I learned things. I expected a better reward, though! Booooo.
- Right after my hour expired, I met Owain. Oh god, the Tranquil don’t even know when to save themselves. I kind of feel bad for them.
I am so excited for this part of the game. Why can’t I just sit and play for 40 hours straight???
My Character Stats
Damage Dealt: 13501
Greatest damage dealt: 34
Contribution to party damage: 23
Hit Rate: 85
Most powerful foe slain: Dragon
I also saw the conversation yesterday about me sharing more info of my gameplay, like how I get along with other characters in my party. I don’t know what’s interesting to y’all, but feel free to let me know what other information aside from my stats and such that you want to see! I haven’t started next week’s posts yet, so I’ll integrate those requests into the end of the review. Awesome!
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