In the twelfth hour of Dragon Age: Origins, SLOTHS. Okay, not actual sloths, but still. Also, I couldn’t find a way to stick a Burning Man joke in here. Drat. If you’re intrigued, then it’s time for Mark to play Dragon Age: Origins.
It may have taken twelve hours to get here, but I finally feel like the mechanics of gameplay in Dragon Age: Origins don’t confuse me anymore. I’m not overwhelmed by the Tactics menu, by learning how to switch between my Shapeshifter identities, by developing solo techniques to defeat all the enemies that I face, and by being TOTALLY FUCKING AWESOME.
It definitely helps that this entire sequence in the Fade is so complicated and challenging that it forced me to learn real quickly. Many times, I had to switch from Roslin to the Burning Man and then the Golem in a matter of seconds, so until I figured out that I could program them into my R2 menu. Some characters/shapeshifters were way better at attacking certain baddies, and then I got Golem and OH MY GOD HE IS SO SATISFYING TO USE.
Anyway, for the entire time I’m in the Fade, I’d like to chronicle the exact path I take through this part of the game:
The Burning Tower
I figured I might as well start with the closest part of the Fade. The enemies were relatively easy to defeat, as Roslin’s electric sword and dual attack DECIMATED THEM. I kept Peter Pettigrew-ing my way into other rooms until I was able to get the Burning Man form. OH SHIT HIS SPECIAL POWERS ARE SO AMAZING. Not only can you walk through fire, you spit out a beam of fire and then you do that thing where it’s like RING OF FIRE and I swear, one day, I will learn the proper terms for these things. It’s also nice that Roslin can still use her dual-wielding weapons, too!
The Mage Asunder
Believing that I was totally prepared for the Fade, I haughtily traveled to The Mage Asunder, ready to destroy a bunch of mages.
I was killed six times in the first sixty seconds. WELL. THAT WAS SOBERING. I realized that Mages can cast spells and hexes through the wall. You fucking cheaters. I think the next time I play through Dragon Age, I want to be a mage. Their skill/special trees are SO LARGE. Oh my god, there’s so much you can do! So it took me being creative to take them down. First, before I even approached the door they were all hiding behind, I’d use Roslin and go into Stealth mode. I ran past the door so that they’d open it, but since I was invisible, their initial spells didn’t work. Then I snuck in the room, got behind the most powerful mage, immediately stunned him and then did my DOUBLE STUNNING BUTTSTAB OF DEATH. He’d be dead in three hits, and I could focus on the other two, wherein I’d shapeshift to Burning Man and drop a fire bomb to light them up and annihilate them.
This area was far more complicated than the Burning Tower, and I certainly died a few times before I made it to them room with THE GOLEM POWER. OH SHIT. Now I could up the Metal Doors! And I could mass stun people.
Before that, though, I picked up the Essence of Magic, earning a permanent +1 to magic. YES. YES. I LOVE GETTING REWARDED FOR GOING INTO EVERY ROOM. Despite this, though, I then faced the most difficult villain in the game so far: Rhagos. Fourteen. That’s how many times he killed me before I finally was able to stun him enough times and combine the Golem, Burning Man, and Roslin specials to destroy him. My god, he fucked me up. I felt rather satisfied that I beat him, though. I’m learning. IT’S SO BEAUTIFUL.
But all the deaths and repetitive fights drained down my hour, and after only conquering two areas of the Fade, I was out of time. DAMN IT. MUST FIGHT BETTER TOMORROW.
My Character Stats
Dexterity: 22+14 (FUCK YEAH, LOOK HOW AWESOME I AM)
Constitution: 19+6 (Y’ALL ARE JEALOUS. Okay, you’re not.)
Damage dealt: 32742 (FUCK YEAH, I RULE)
Friendly -fire: 0
Greatest damage dealt: 46
Contribution to party damage: 38
Hit rate: 86
Most powerful foe slain: Abomination
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